By Rashelle Hintz
“I have no idea what my goals are, what my motivation is, or what I’m hoping to accomplish ... but I’ll come home once I figure it out."
These were my parting words to my husband as I loaded my gear and started to head out. I mean, truly I might be home later that night...but I did leave meal ideas for three days. I won’t have cell service. I don’t want to feel like I’m in a box completing a task. I don’t have the mental fortitude at the moment to successfully pull off an endurance event. I needed something different.
When I saw the WWW virtual event I knew I needed to participate. I had successfully completed my 2020 goals, had a blast, and felt fulfilled. Despite the cancelations I chose virtual or solo events to replicate Zumbro 50 in April, La Crosse Marathon in May, Voyager in July, 80 miles for Goosebumps in September, and a spontaneous trip to the Grand Canyon for R2R2R in October. I wasn’t looking for another event. But I WAS planning Tuscobia 80 and St Croix 40 so it only seemed appropriate to join the winter solstice gang.
Well “winter route” pulling my sled was out of the question since we still had no snow. Disappointment wasn’t the exact motivation I was looking for. I was feeling blah about another event utilizing my house as my aid station. I needed something more than my familiar trails and routes. I decided that I didn’t need another race. I needed an adventure. I needed to take the focus off how many miles I was going to cover and discover what I actually needed. How do you plan for that? You don’t. But you kind of do. You just plan time, and then you go.
So I went. I drove an hour to Zumbro Bottoms, a state forest in Minnesota that I’d never been to. Over 40 miles of trails I’d never set foot on. Remote camping where I wouldn’t be distracted. Of the grid. Quiet (well except for coyotes). I prepped my hydration pack with homemade gu (maple syrup, peanut butter, molasses and salt), water, potato chips and pickle juice. I parked my truck where I could utilize it to refill water/fuel as needed and headed out for a run. Somewhere along the line, I gave myself the goal of 50 miles, but that wasn’t until day two. See I ran till dark, stopped and enjoyed a campfire and hot supper, headed out again (because it was only 6:15!) for some night miles. I had a horrible night’s sleep learning how to bivvy and dealing with condensation and in turn ice. I hiked some early morning miles just to stay warm, and then transitioned into a lovely day of trail running in moderate temps. I felt fantastic during those sunny, daylight miles. I dreaded another night but I just knew I needed to stay. I needed to know if night 2 was easier. If it got better with practice. If I could learn how to overcome the feelings of anxiety during those long night hours alone with no cell service and only the sounds of coyotes for company. To be there and to know I was doing it only for myself is a sense of freedom, and yet obligation. Because if I can, then I know I must. And so I did.
This time I set myself up for the night better. I was done with the “run” portion of the trip so I was able to transition mentally. I settled down with a book by the campfire for a few hours, journaled my experience, and finally went to sleep feeling relaxed in a peaceful way. I missed my family so much and felt ready to go home. When I’m surrounded by people, noise, schedules and obligations I just crave solitude and quiet. Escaping to the woods and having this experience helped me appreciate all of the variety life has to offer. I think it’s called balance.
This wasn’t a physically exhausting experience. I never hit any walls I had to push through. I ate when I was hungry. I slept when I was tired. The hours of running new territory fed my soul and left me energized. My first-time solo overnights satisfied my curiosity. The experience felt like an adventure that created itself in the time I gave it space to fill. Thank you, WWW, for creating an event that gave me the parameters and opportunity to have this experience! Yet another successful virtual event that I’m hooked on.
